So I have been pondering over the last few days about relationships - how original of me. Anyhow my main thought has been whether its possible to be happy with the same one person for your whole life? One of my close friends recently broke up with her boyfriend of 2 years. Now they had a great relationship it started off great, but ended in a very teary phone call, so what went wrong?  Why does it seem that relationships, no matter how well they start out, just seem to be doomed?! Everything starts out all butterflies and roses, you have eyes for no-one else and then before you know it, you cant stand how loudly they chew their apple and if they sing along to one more song on the radio with the wrong lyrics, you might just wind up on some crime investigation show. In general I have major doubts when it comes to relationships, specifically marriage and its longevity.

Now I have had my fair share of screw-ups, you live and learn, but when I look around me at the relationships of my close friends and acquaintances I have yet to find a couple I think really has “it’. Is this just due to poor partner choice? My best friend and I have this inside joke, where we call “the one” our lobster. So do people just give up too quickly in the search for their lobster, and settle, or is there really no one person for us out there, but just a whole host of choices that would suit? If the latter is the case then someone should sue Hollywood for leading us all to believe that we all have a perfect soul mate out there, just waiting to “complete us”. Im just not sure whether its the institution of marriage that is flawed or are we as the human race more screwed up than ever?! I’m not sure what the divorce statistics are these days, Im actually too afraid to even do the research, as cynical as I am I think deep down I want to be able to believe that marriage can and does still work. Actually scrap that, I don’t want it to just work, I want it to be great! I know relationships take work - so is the lack of successful relationships just due to us as a society being darn right lazy?!

I have this fear that marriage ruins everything, that people stop trying so hard, that complacency takes residence, women get fat and stop wearing makeup and men stop buying you flowers and start buying golf memberships. In all honesty i think I would rather be alone than end up in a sub-standard marriage, I would rather be dinner for one, than dinner for two when they sit across from each other in a restaurant and stare into the distance, saying nothing. I want to be that old couple holding hands, I want rose petals and surprises, I want to be able to look at my partner and  know that I would rather be there with them than anywhere else, yes it will take work, yes perhaps its really idealistic, but I don’t care and I wont settle - I want the lobster, not the crayfish.